The Jacquie Hirsch for A.L.L. Foundation
 
 
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Cause' when push        
        comes to shove
You taste what        
        you're made of.
You might bend,        
        till you break
Cause its all        
        you can take.
On your knees        
        you look up,
Decide you've        
        had enough.
You get mad,        
        you get strong,
Wipe your hands        
        shake it off,
THEN YOU STAND.
August 2008
 

August 31st 2008 - Day 31 Early morning. Yesterday was an ok day, hopefully a great day with the things going on inside Jacquie that we can't see, like more cancer cells being killed and a lot of healing taking place. The ICU Dr. decided he wanted Jacquie off some of the sedation. She opened her eyes on occasion but didn't respond to any questions. Her bilirubin continues to raise and is a major concern. It measures the ability of the liver to process all the waste and toxins that have built up in her body. Maybe later today we will see some improvements. Her am nurse Sam said she can't believe how strong she is for being bedridden so long. She is working real hard at fighting and currently its the worst of this long fight. It may get better, it may not, we don't know, but what we do know is that strength is synonymous with Jacquie, they just go hand in hand. She just finished a short pt session to allow some body movement for when she gets out of here. The car show and cruise was successful for the first year. TJ did a great job putting it together. We had a dozen cars and bikes do the cruise to Roswell where we presented $500 for the pediatric unit in Jacquie's honor. Many family and friends stopped by to show their support for the event and the team car wash at the gym. We had several gymnasts cartwheel their way to raising additional funds for us to help with the donation. Thank you to all the family and friends that came, your support is so greatly appreciated. Alicia and Ashley constantly send messages on the guest book and they didn't miss the opportunity to come and support Jacquie - thank you both.. Casey say hi to Rascal Flatts for Jacquie today. Enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend, the sun is shining outside and its shining over Jacquie as well, so keep BELIEVING.
 

August 30th 2008 - Day 30 Early morning hours - CRUISE AGAINST CANCER DAY AT THE GYM (see "events" on the site) Yesterday was another tough one. Jacquie was sedated all day and was taken into surgery for the trach tube to be placed in her neck. The procedure only took an hour and went perfect. They removed the intubation tube and took a piece of tissue from the inside of her mouth that required one stitch. It will be used to determine the level of GVHD. We know this surgery is for the best and will allow her a better opportunity to recover without so much trauma to her voice box and throat. It was nevertheless, painful to sign the consent seeing her current condition. The ventilator is now hooked up to the tube in her neck and is making her lungs work much better than before. Having been bedridden and sedated for the better part of two weeks, she is still very weak but continues to fight on demonstrating strong vitals signs. She will stay sedated the rest of the holiday weekend and hopefully her lungs and liver will show improvement. Even though she seems to be comfortable and resting well, we are really really missing her smile and her voice. Many staff members from the other floors stop in daily to get their "Jacquie fix" while others can't bear to see her the way she is right now. Either way, deep down, she is still the same beautiful, strong, caring and courageous person we all love. We are thankful for the tremendous love and support we receive daily from our family, our friends and our BELIEVERS. Make a difference today, go out of your way to do something special for someone or just pass on a smile. Smiles are always free to give and priceless to receive.
 

August 28th 2008 - Day 28 and beating cancer for 11 months today. Cancer must have known Jacquie has been winning and this morning had to test her courage and strength yet again. She did well through the night, however, this morning with a very sudden onset her left lung was compromised and her breathing functions dropped quickly. As a result the ICU team had to re-intubate her and place her back under sedation and on the ventilator. She was running a temp as well. The previous option of putting in a trach tube has now been decided and will happen tomorrow. They will have to cut a hole in her throat and place a plastic breathing tube in to maintain a open airway. Oh and did I mention out loud today how much I hate cancer. It can do what ever it is going to do to my daughter and I have no say, but it will never ever take my love and hope for her away from me. Her battle scars are great with a large portion of her face having the first layer of skin peeled away from her first breathing tube, blisters on her chin and ears from the top gun mask and scars from the CV lines in her neck. Her body rash and skin color change has been determined from the skin biopsy to in fact be GVHD and is being treated. She is sleeping now and continuing to fight. No fever is showing after some antibiotics this morning and a recent chest x-ray shows some lung improvement after several breathing treatments and the ventilator set higher to expand her lungs. As I watch her rest, I can only hope her dreams take her far away from this ICU room. And did I mention how much I hate cancer, I'm sure I did, that is why I choose to BELIEVE in Jacquie.
 

August 27th 2008 - Day 27 - After a good nights sleep, Jax came back in style. She did PT with Kathy and continues to respond well. She sat up in bed for a little bit and continues to recognize more of her surroundings. Still unable to talk, and working on processing all of what is going on, it is the best when she just recognizes us and can nod yes or no. Jax has been sedated for so long that it It will all come back in time. She has been through hell the past 11 months (tomorrow marks that day) and she is beat up inside and out but, certainly not beaten. It will take some time to get back to her tink room, then home, but it will happen. Her blood gasses continue to come back within normal limits and her breathing is holding steady. The skin biopsy will let us know the level of GVHD present. She has had several visitors today and the hospital staff continues to peek in and look after her. With your power of BELIEF, she will continue to improve each day.
 

August 26th 2008 - Day 26 - What a day yesterday! Day 12 in the ICU and another milestone, the breathing tube was taken out and the ventilator turned off.Jacquie is semi alert, still a great deal of medication in her body that needs to be processed. She sat up in a special chair and checked out a communications board as she can not talk right now from having the tube in for so long. After being sedated for so long Jacquie didn't want to miss anything more so she stayed up almost the entire night. Because of no rest her o2 is down and co2 up along with her heart rate so this morning it is back on the bipap machine with the top gun mask on. She had the maximum dose of sleeping meds last night but it didn't do anything. So much of one thing effects another. It is a very frustrating process to keep everything in line with her breathing, heart rate, blood pressure, input/output in balance just to mention a few. She will have a skin biopsy today on her back for the rash that is spreading fast, is thought to be GVHD (graft vs host disease). We will wish for more progress today and keep BELIEVING even more for tomorrow.

August 24th 2008 - Day 24 - Yesterday turned out to be a good day with a little progress on several fronts. Jacquie was off the ventilator from 7:30am - early evening and doing well breathing on her own. She is still not alert enough to communicate with us and phases in and out of being awake due to the high level of medications in her system. A smile or a hand squeeze means the world to us at this point. She had some visitors yesterday and could recognize them with a gesture. We never thought Jax would be in ICU this long. We are hoping to get her out real soon and pray her lung functioning is normal. If not, they are thinking they would have to place a trach tube in her neck. We are trying hard not to even think about going there. She was awake most of last night, very fussy and unable to relax, its probably her way of saying, no matter how much sedation meds you give me, I just want the hell out of here. Today the decision was made to take her off the vent then to leave her on because of the poor night's rest she had the night before. She is breathing outside the parameters set on her breathing machine which means she that she is taking some breaths on her own. Blood work was looking good, no temps, or fevers and the rashes haven't got any worse on her hands and feet. On the down side, her skin is starting to break down from the tape on her face to hold the tube in place and her ears are showing signs of blistering due to the constant rubbing against the pillow. Tomorrow is a big day. They will take her off her vent in the morning with the hope she will be able to breathe normally and know even a little of what is going on. These 11 days in ICU have been some of the longest and most difficult in the past eleven months. Sometimes we wonder how much Jacquie has to endure and how much can we handle. It is at that point we realize "WE BELIEVE" and enduring is what Jacquie will do and handling whatever comes our way, is what we will do. As times get tougher, and they will, it is without question and without a doubt our "we believe" gets even stronger. As you start your new day, don't just have a good day, make it a good day. As Jax would say, we each have the ability to do so.
 

August 22nd 2008 - Day 22 - Today will be another difficult day but we will all get through it. Jax has been taken off the ventilator and she has been in and out of consciousness. The Drs. have decreased the steroids to help her level of awareness when she comes to. By doing this, the GVHD will set in more quickly. She has some skin discoloration as a result already not to mention what may be happening inside that we can't see, hopefully graph vs leukemia. Her counts are coming in nicely which is encouraging. That means the engrafting process is underway and producing new blood cells. Jax continues to make a little progress each day regardless of what problem she encounters. Best wishes to Ashley, Sandra, and Jill this weekend in the triathlon in Chicago. By carrying thoughts of Jacquie throughout the event there is no doubt they will do well. Make sure you take pictures girls so we can share them on the site. Keep the 30th on your social calendars open for the cruise against cancer. Wherever we are and whatever we are doing, a sprinkle of TINK goes a long way. As she "sleeps" we continue to fill her head with thoughts of BELIEVING.
 

August 21st 2008 - Day 21 - Jacquie had a day filled with fight and struggles yesterday. She was semi-concious for part of the day and was breathing on her own for over twelve hours. She even had a short PT session with Kathy (one of Jacquie's very good friends' Mom) it was a big step. Her eyes weren't open much at all as it may be hard adjusting to the light and sedation. More good happened than bad, I won't go into detail but she will undergo a liver biopsy later today which will help determine her immediate treatment direction. With a temp up then down, cut and swollen lips from the tube and some fluid retention, she truly looks like a fighter on the outside now as well. We already knew she is a tremendous fighter on the inside. Her Dr. said the other day, that considering all Jacquie has been through since her diagnosis, most wouldn't have made it this far. It was a testament of who she is, but on the other hand, disheartening to think of what she has had to endure to be able to live. I have this poem on my office desk under glass that Jacquie gave me seven years ago. Allow me to share it with you. Please read it twice. Once to learn more about Jacquie's character and then a second time to internalize some of the meaning into your own daily lives. As we continue to BELIEVE in Jacquie's quest for life, she gives us the opportunity to BELIEVE in ourselves.

A POEM FROM JACQUIE - 2001

LIFE

A sunrise is like a new beginning.
A new beginning to a new day.
It's the only time when you can put your problems behind you.
You choose whether you know it or not, if it's going to be a good day, or a bad day.
You choose whether you are going to let your problems make or break you.

If you choose you are not going to let something bother you, it won't.
If you choose you are going to let something bother you, it will.
It's really that simple.
You choose your own destiny.

What becomes of your life is depended on you, and you alone.
You must have confidence.
That's how you attack life, even when you think you have no control over it.


August 20th 2008 - Day 20 -Jacquie is still fighting extremely hard. She continues to be sedated and on the ventilator to breathe. As we approach day five, it seems like a lifetime that we havent been able to see and listen to the Jacquie we all know and love. Yesterday they tried to take Jax of the ventilator again for a short time. This time she woke up to Sharon and I holding her hands and directing her thoughts. She fought back the tears as she tried to make sense of where she was and what was going on. Her lungs were working well without the ventilator, however, she still had difficulty in controlling her breathing level so after and hour and a half she was sedated again and placed back on the ventilator. We continue to fill her with love, praise and encouragement knowing on some level she can hear us. Her liver functions continue to be of concern and are being addressed. We allow the words from last week of no noticeable leukemia cells in her blood results, to echo in our minds as times get tough. The all important bone marrow is still slated in about 10 days. Also in 10 days, TJ has organized the first annual Cruise Against Cancer. A car and motorcycle show & cruise. Visit the events page of Jax's site for information and join us on August 30th at the gym. Jacquie may be in Roswell or home on that day, regardless, we plan to let her know with balloons and horns that we are all behind her and supporting her. In the mean time, please say and extra prayer to get her well enough to leave the ICU and get back to her "Tink" room or even better, her room at home. Hold those you care about most close to your heart and let them know it. Our deepest and most sincere thanks for having lived and experienced what love and friendship is all about, from you OUR BELIEVERS. You have aided us in this difficult journey more than you will ever know.
 

August 18th 2008 - Day 18 -Yesterday turned into one of our most mentally draining days as parents. The decision was made to take Jax off her breathing tube and ventilator in the morning to see how she could tolerate breathing on her own. I stayed the night in the ICU waiting room while Sharon took the chance to duck home for some rest. Needless to say, I was pissed to get a call saying that Jax was awake, and very agitated & confused. Well when you put a young person unconscious for over two days, wake her up with tubes coming out of her mouth and nose, no Mom or Dad in sight and unfamiliar faces around, what the hell (just thought I would use the pg version of what I was really thinking) do you think was going to happen? Jax's lung functions were looking good but basically we were in for about six hours of hell. Jacquie was very disoriented, confused and very anxious. She couldn't relax and as the day wore on her breathing got faster and pressured with lung functions decreasing. We tried to tell her it was like a bad night out with the SDT's (too much partying) but she wasn't with it enough to understand the humor. They tried the "top gun" oxygen mask but she kept trying to take it off. By the early evening the decision was to put her back under sedation and back on the ventilator. The transplant Drs. think her confusion is do to the steroids she is on to control the GVHD (graft vs host disease). They are slowly decreasing these as of yesterday and hoping that something else doesn't go haywire. Today was mostly uneventful, thank God. Jacquie was sedated the entire day. They may try taking her off again tomorrow. Meanwhile, her chest x-ray looked good showing less fluid around her lungs & blood work is good also. We continue to talk to her, reassure her and remind her of the thousands of followers that she has backing her up in this incredibly brave fight. We know that she understands. We also know that she has made a very important decision. One that gives us some much needed reassurance. We can always hope and BELIEVE for a better tomorrow.
 

August 17th 2008 - Day 17 - Its very early morning on Sunday and Jacquie's status has remained very stable while in the ICU. Her vital signs have remained steady and if she continues on this path, the Drs. will plan to bring her out from total sedation and hopefully remove her breathing tube and discontinue the respirator Monday or Tuesday. Having her in an unconscious state for so long and seeing her with a tube in her mouth, two tubes in her nose, a blood pressure cuff on her arm, a arterial line in her hand to monitor her heart rate, six leads hooked up to her chest to monitor her respirations, pulse, blood oxygen level, and I think the proximity of the nearest piece of Kryptonite just in case Superwoman starts to slow down they can move it further away, the double line in her chest and another double in her arm to give the countless meds she is getting, is a great deal to bear and is hurtful to see. We know it is for the best and because WE BELIEVE so strongly, it will all come to pass. As Jacquie "sleeps" we continue to talk to her and fill her head with love and praise. We have put on the Olympics for her to listen to as she fights with Olympic proportions against this unforgiving disease. She listens to music at times, we rub her feet and hands with cream, Sharon does her mouth care and we let her know the tremendous number of Believers behind her, next to her and with her, always - just always. Personally, I had an incredible day yesterday being given the opportunity, by chance, to speak with a Doctor that was very special to Sharon and I over 25 years ago. That experience prompted me to do something special for some nice kids raising money at a car wash for Carly's Club. I managed to run a 5K for the Leukemia & Lymphomia Society without stopping and crossing the finish line on my hands, all this because constant thoughts of Jacquie enlightened my day. It is my hope that those of you who think of Jacquie daily as well, have that extra brightness hilighting your day too. Its pretty amazing how wonderful thoughts can change anything and the darkest of days. It is with great appreciation our family says: THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING !
 

August 14th 2008 - Day 14 - Sorry for the lack of communication the last several days. Things with Jax have been getting difficult and Sharon has been very busy making this ordeal as smooth as can be for Jax. WOW what a Mom. Who would have known in middle school I would have had an eye for such a terrific Mom :) Jacquie has been busy fighting these past few days, not only to kick cancer's a** but for breaths as well. Her breathing breathing capacity has diminished significantly and her Pulse/O2 has been very low. She was placed on oxygen and then on a BiPap machine with a mask that was strapped to her head, it was a bit scary to watch as it forced oxygen into her. It looked like she was ready to take Goose's place with Maverick in Top Gun. I'm sure she would have rather been there too than in a hospital bed. The problem can be two fold. She has retained a considerable amount for fluids which have gone in along with her IV's and medications but it may have compromised her lungs. They haven't ruled out an infection, and will do a bronc test tomorrow. Hours ago she has was transfered to the ICU (which is the "emergency room" in Roswell) and has been given a breathing tube and placed on a resporator. She is heavily sedated and is resting (comfortably we hope). The great news of the day after we were hit with having to displace Tink and her beautiful room, was the results of her blood test came back with no visible signs of leukemia in it. Her counts are starting to come up a little which means the stems cells are engrafting, and working. However since she is retaining so much fluid it is surrounding her lungs, diminishing their capacity and making her heart work overtime. We will try to keep everyone updated but this is a critical time as her lungs, heart and breathing is a serious issue to get under control. Jacquie has a team of doctors, nurses and support staff that are doing everything possible to get her back on track, which they will. It will just take some time to sort all of these issues out. Be sure to enjoy whatever you are doing and whomever you are with this upcoming weekend, because caring thoughts of Jacquie always make everything just a little brighter. Thank you all for Believing and we hope to have better news in the next several days.
 

August 10th 2008 - Day 10. Off to a good start today. Yesterday was rough, like the first transplant at Sloan in NYC the engrafting process has started in her bone marrow, so her hips and body is aching and downright painful. She has been on oxygen to keep her levels up and the tissue swelling has been quite high in her ankles, face, etc. She continues to plug away despite these circumstances. The high light of yesterday was the benefit Jacquie's friends Ashley and Sandra put on for her. They did a wonderful job putting together a basket and 50/50 raffle with a dinner & drinks at Andiamo's on Deleware. What a wonderful turnout, Jacquie was excited to hear about everyone that came, looking forward to the time she can spend some quality time with all those great friends and their families.  Ashley and Sandra have been training for the 2008 Accenture Chicago Triathlon in two weeks sponsored by the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Our family is humbled by the tremendous support, love, and consideration by so many friends. You are certainly amazing !!! This next story is especially for Sharon, Jacquie (whom I told about yesterday), Sara, Sue, and any others friends who thoroughly enjoy the sport of people falling down. While going out to the truck to get a couple cards with beer in hand (and thinking about Jacquie and all her friends and families that came) I managed to miss steps three and four leading to the front doors & fell flat on my face! When spotting gymnasts I have managed to catch a falling gymnast, fall myself and roll out back up to my feet. Not this time, just plain flat on my face. My finish was some very strong swear words to myself, quite possibly out loud. No roll out onto Deleware Avenue, no presentation to the crowd, just plain flat on my face. Now others Sara, possibly your brother Mike, would not have found this display so funny. He would have been more concerned than you. He would have wanted more detail such as, how much beer was spilled and what brand was I drinking. Sorry you missed it, I don't think it will make it to u-tube, so your imagination of the event will have to serve as your best source of humor. Getting back to the person we all want to hear about, Jax. She had a better nights sleep last night and is still on pain medication for her hips. Jax had a special visit from Nikki and her Mom this afternoon which was nice for her. Now shes resting and watching some more of the Olympics while Sharon takes a short break at home. Jax also walked another 5 laps today. Until tomorrow, we are most thankful for the courage, determination, and class Jacquie shows us each and every day. We can count on an Olympic fight from her as we all cheer her on with "We Believe".
 

August 8th 2008 - Day 8.  No news, good or bad, to report. The days move slowly by, and we wait. Jax has been incredibly tired these past few days, just getting through the normal daily chores is difficult. It seems she is in bed the same amount of time, but is not getting enough sleep time. This morning when I had to wake her, for the fifth time in 2 hours, I asked how she was feeling. She said "very frustrated."  She said she knows that the nurses and doctors have things they have to do, but they expect her to be able to be active and out of bed and exercising, when she hasn't had enough sleep. It makes me feel so bad for her when we have to keep pushing her. This morning she received platelets and a unit of blood, so we hope that those will help give her a little more energy for today. THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH to our blood donors. Once again, both units were direct donations and the people here at Roswell continue to be amazed at the number of people coming in to donate. It is such a wonderful gift to give, to Jax or someone else who desperately needs it.  Some days it is hard for me to write these updates, and TJ or Torey do them. The days that are difficult are the days that Jax is having a hard time, either physically, emotionally, or both. I see her courage and determination and wonder how long she can keep it up. I wonder if she will "run out" of fight. Then I tell myself "She will keep fighting as long as she has to, and she will never "run out", because she is Jacqueline Elisabeth Hirsch!". Then I have to try to not be so angry and so mad that this has happened to her. I have to try not to find reasons and answers where there are none. She has been so strong through all of this, the least I can do is try to be strong too. I will be strong. And we will all KEEP BELIEVING.
 

August 6th 2008 - Day 6.  Jax continues to receive blood and platelet transfusions, almost on a daily basis. There are no words to thank all of you who continue to donate in her name. Every unit she has been given this past week has had the wonderful green tag, and the other patients also continue to benefit from your generosity because any donations not used before they are close to expiring are given to someone else who needs it. I'm willing to bet that Roswell has rarely had such a ready supply of desparately needed blood products. It is a wonderful gift to give, and is truly "the gift of life". The days continue to move forward toward our goal of engraftment. We all know that this is a waiting game, but it is still hard to stop from wanting time to move a lot faster. Jacquie continues to push on, making herself get out of bed, move around, and try to eat a little, do her breathing exercises, and everything else she is asked to do. I know there are many days when she feels so weak and lousy that she just wants to scream at all of us to get out and shut the door behind us. The mornings are particularly rough. She is not "normally" real pleasant in the mornings, but it seems there is a revolving door on her room from about 4 am to 12 noon. There are meds to be given, vital signs to be taken, assessments to be made by about half dozen different people,(all separately) and numerous other interruptions. By 12 noon, when she needs to be up and out of bed, she is exhausted from a poor night sleep and from the busy morning. I give her a lot of credit because as of yet she has not screamed at anyone, including me, to get out and leave her alone. I do, however, see that happening in the future! She is a lot more tolerant than many people would be. Last night was our "Wipeout" night and that is so much fun to watch with her. No matter how bad the day has been, there is laughter between 8 and 9 pm on Tues. night! So, on to another day of Jax fighting her way towards her dreams. Dreams are wonderful things to have. Nobody and nothing (even leukemia) can take them away from you- you own them and you control them. They give us hope and promise for a better tomorrow. They take us places we cannot always go. They make us stronger and they give our lives meaning. Never stop dreaming, and never stop BELIEVING.
 

August 4th 2008 - Day 4 - Yesterday was pretty much a replay of the day before. Those of you who were with us for the first transplant, probably remember the first couple weeks were fairly quiet, we were in the "waiting mode". The days are spent getting transfused when needed, getting meds changed and rearranged, resting, trying to eat, exercising, walking laps, and trying to keep distracted. The waiting is hard, we really want to see the blood count numbers starting to go up, and unfortunately, it takes time. So, we wait. For Jax, this period of time is very difficult, because she really wants to  be home, being "normal". I wish I could take her out of here, even for another short stay at home, just to give her spirits a lift. She has heard about one of the other patients on the floor who has been here for 105 days, and this makes her panic. We keep trying to reassure her that we will do everything we can to make this stay as short as possible. We also remind her that most of the work is up to her. And we all know, Jax is up to the challenge. So, at times our days feel as though we are in the movie "Groundhog Day" where every day is a repeat of the day before. On the plus side of that, it means we have no new issues to deal with, and that is always a good thing. We are really settling into her new room. It is way bigger than the last one, and has more room for her "things". You know, her pictures, games, computer, DVDs, boom box, balloons, stuffed animals and of course, snacks! We have decorated it to the max, and it is becoming quite a showplace. We have even noticed some of the other rooms starting to be decorated and having balloons brought in. We try to make it as cheerful and upbeat as possible, and we think it really helps lift her mood up. So, until she is home, her room here is like a second home. Good news!!!!!!!! Dr. McCarthy just came in a told us that her chest X-Ray from yesterday "looks good". There was some concern about the pneumonia having returned because her breath sounds were a little decreased and she has a cough. So, for now, that is not a issue YEA!!!!!! We hope you all have a good day, and that whatever you do today brings you some happiness and makes you smile. Remember, you can make a difference in somebody's day just by giving them a smile. Be Happy and BELIEVE.
 

August 2nd 2008 - Day 2 - I can say, I honestly never thought I would be counting "days" again. I am thankful that we are able to. Jax had a good day yesterday. One of the few days that she has not needed platelets, blood, magnesium, potassium, or anything else to be replaced. She was able to do some laps, and work with Kevin for a little while. She tires very quickly, so she rests in-between activities. She has started to try to eat more foods, and so far is tolerating everything that has gone in. Her spirits are good, and she keeps everyone on their toes. Jax's smile has become a beacon for some of the staff here, who come to her room and ask her to smile for them. It seems that her smile has a way of making it a great day for anyone on the receiving end of it! (We already knew that, didn't we!) Her nights are better, for now, because she is not getting as many medications during the night and is able to sleep for longer periods of time. This does not mean, however, that she is getting up any earlier. Jax is still not a morning person, and  prefers to stay in bed as late as possible in the morning! This morning she has an excuse to sleep in. The nurse just started a unit of platelets (direct donor-THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!), and she is receiving a dose of magnesium through the IV, and she will have to have a unit of blood this morning when the platelets are finished. So, the pre-medication with Benedryl will keep her sleepy into early afternoon. Then, I (warden) will have to have her get up and get moving, and catch up on the day. I can't wait until these new stem cells start kicking in and she won't need the blood and platelets on such a regular basis. We know that it will be at least a couple weeks before we can expect to see any change in blood counts, but just like last time, we are anxiously waiting for the news that her counts are going up. In the mean time, we need to keep Jax infection free, and continuing to get stronger for the fight ahead. We know it's a fight she will win, but we want her as prepared as possible, because it won't be an easy one. We also know that she doesn't fight alone. That all of you who have stood by her side will continue to do so, and that knowledge makes the uncertainty of what is ahead, so much easier for Jax to deal with. We are so very grateful to all of you. It's hard to find the words, each time I want to say thank you, that would let you all know what it means to have such an incredible amount of support. I go to bed at night and say a prayer for all of you, that you might know how much you mean to our family. Please know that you have helped us get Jax to where she is today, a second chance at life, and we will never forget all our friends and family who have stood at our side to encourage, support, and love her. I hope you all have a great weekend, and that the sun shines for you. Remember to share your love and smile with someone who needs it, And as always, KEEP BELIEVING